We can often spot complainers—when it’s other people. They’re the kind of people who always seem to be complaining, negative, stuck in victimhood. It’s harder to see it when we’re the ones who are often complaining. And in fact, in my experience, most of us are in the habit of complaining, either out loud or to ourselves. Myself included. I’ve seen people who have gone on a “complaining diet”—when they don’t let themselves complain for a month. This is an incredible practice. However, if we simply try to stop the complaining, we miss a wonderful opportunity to bring mindfulness to the process. For example: If we are complaining, what’s the emotion underneath the complaint? Could we practice being with that? Could we be with the fear that is at the root of the emotion? With this kind of mindfulness practice, the complaint becomes an opportunity to be with our experience, …