When in the midst of great sadness or grief, people really want someone to be with them in their pain. It may be necessary to refrain from turning a friend’s painful experience into an idea or an opportunity to be helpful or wise. Try to keep a suffering friend company in their truth, however messy it is. Have you ever told a friend about a deeply upsetting experience and then had the friend tell you all the reasons why that experience won’t be upsetting at some point in the future? Have you ever been that friend who offers that advice? If we’re no longer a child, we probably already know that our feelings are going to change over time. We’ve had enough life experience to trust this truth. So, when we are reminded that what feels terrible now will eventually feel less terrible, and maybe even normal, we don’t actually feel …