Commentary People often say you shouldn’t take things personally, but that doesn’t really help you. It mostly helps the person who’s saying it. It helps a friend to stay on your good side by agreeing that your boss or your spouse is the problem. It helps a parent bond with their child by agreeing that a bad grade is the teacher’s fault. It helps a politician win your vote when they blame “the system” for your frustrations. Blame feels good in the short run, but it makes things worse in the long run. It makes you feel powerless, so you don’t invest effort in steps that could actually improve your life. Blame focuses you on what you can’t control, so you ignore things you can control. And you don’t even realize you’ve made a choice when you point fingers of blame. You think you’re just seeing the facts. To recognize …