“I want it all, I want it all, I want it all, and I want it now.” These were the words of a television jingle I heard this weekend, just as I was contemplating a piece on the pressure we (both women and men) face to have it all. Working with Jane, a mom and physician, I was struck by how tortured she was because she couldn’t spend as much time as she wanted to with her young child. I wasn’t struck by the fact that time away from her child was painful, but rather by what seemed to be the real source of her suffering. Specifically, she felt that she was supposed to be able to have the great career she wanted as a doctor and also be able to be the loving and present mom to her child. As she saw it, she was doing something wrong because she couldn’t have …